Feeding Pigeons in Osu

This song came to me in a dream. My dream told me that it first appeared in a Joe Cocker dream, so, in a way, this is my first Cocker cover.

Look Flashy...Even in the Rain?! [NSFW]

This video does not contain any porn or violent images, but if you're prone to "emotional screams" or "excitement seizures," you might want to bring your computer into a bathroom stall right about now.

We all know that looking sexy is easy on a sunny day... but when it's raining, it's hard to distinguish between a homeless man and a super model. Let's just say I've been caught "heavy petting the wrong kind of bum" on more than one occasion, and it was probably because it was raining or something. With this new invention, people will instantly be able to see that you are a "hunk" and/or "babe" in the worst of weather.

Also, I've always had a few problems with umbrellas:
1. Not enough people stare at me while I hold one.
2. They barely use any electricity.
These are problems no more. Behold...

TRUE LOVE TESTER

The fine folks at Ravijour have just made an invention that will change how women's bras burst open forever! You know how there's all these guyz that are really good at getting girls, right? It turns out that women's brains are really stupid, so they need a device to let them know if they're feeling true love. Of course, if you are feeling true love, the next logical step is to have your bra burst open. This true love tester senses when your heat is beating quickly (ie. true love) and makes your bra unhook. It might also open when you run, or when a man shows you a knife and says he wants to caress your cold dead body (it turns out that he's the one). You can't actually buy this bra yet, but if you spend ¥5000 or more at Ravijour, you can enter a contest with first prize being a stay at a hotel where you can use this bra!

On a side note, I'm a lot like "the flashy guy" at the beginning of the video. Look out ladies.

Vehicle Quiz Time #1

This is going to be the first of many vehicle quiz times. I'm a little surprised I haven't thought of it before. Okay, here goes. What is this vehicle?

Maybe this one is a little too easy. Did you notice that the answer is written in the bottom of the picture? Okay, here's the answer.

Yep, you guys were right. It was a Human vehicle. Let me know how much you enjoyed this in the comments below!

ALT Teaches Students about His Naked Body

He probably meant to show the kids a cool pic of himself like this.

  A Philipino ALT (Assistant Language Teacher) "accidentally" showed 35 of his 8th grade students a nude photo of himself. It seems he hooked his personal computer up to a projector in front of the room, but he forgot what everyone learns on the first day of teacher school..."Remember to close all the windows with photos of your naked body before showing the students that stupid movie or whatever." I guess he noticed the students reacted and was able to erase the image after about ten seconds. He apologized, but for some reason he still lost his job. Just another case of the Japanese not understanding foreign cultures.

Source: Yomiuri Online

Busting Myths #1

 I'm going to try and "bust" two myths with one photo!

Myth #1: "Japan simply isn't able to compete in the male undergarment industry on an international scale."

Gaybot's Take: Just try and stare at this picture for 15 minutes and then look me in the eyes and tell me that myth with a straight face! What? No takers? Didn't think so!

Conclusion: MYTH BUSTED!!!

Myth #2: "Lightning bolts aren't sexy."

Gaybot's Take: Alright, I think it's pretty safe to say that those yellow things are lightning bolts and are not supposed to be sexy tears in reality. Also, I'm clearly at least slightly aroused. Full disclosure, there is a poster of a fire engine within my field of vision. I know a lot of you are going to point out that I had a huge problem with being attracted to large vehicles, but let me remind you that I've been cured for nearly three years. I guess it's possible that somewhere in the recesses of my mind I might find trucks highly erotic, but what are the chances that's the reason I'm turned on right now?

Conclusion: 98% chance MYTH HAS BEEN BUSTED!!!

Glico Pucchin Pudding

9-year-old Miyu Honda stars in this lovely pudding commercial. By the way, if anyone knows how to get in touch with Miyu, please let me know. I've written a pilot for a sitcom where she plays my robot daughter. (It's really funny. Like, she hates water and drinks oil and stuff, and we both learn from each other). While this is a very solid ad, I'm not sure if it's as good as Kyary Pamyu Pamyu's pudding commercials.

Judge!

I know it's only January, but this seems like the odds on favorite to sweep at the Oscars next year. This ad promotes the film perfectly. First, when that dancing fox comes out, the writing says, "This is a cat." Then it says the movie is starring Satoshi Tsumabuki. Finally we learn that the movie can be seen nationwide starting Jan. 11. The rest of it basically speaks for itself.

Mr. Japan 2014

Well, all the finalists have been selected for the 2014 Mr. Japan competition! It looks like this might be the best batch of men yet! They all look delicious, but I'm thinking Mr. Yamanashi is going to be tough to beat! Good luck to all the competitors!

Fit's Betrayal Fruit Gum

Japanese Gum Review #12

This is Fit's uragiri kajitsu gum. Uragiri means betrayal, and kajitsu means fruit. What!? That box appears to upside down, and the fruit looks to be from the 80s! What a betrayal of my trust! As it turns out, "betrayal fruit" must mean "indistinguishable fruit that doesn't taste very good."

Ratings:
Gaybot: 3.5
Girlbot: 2
Overall: 2.75

There is a lot of excitement surrounding this gum because of the campaign associated with it.

Apparently there's a hint in there somewhere. If you can guess the hint and what the prize is on the Fit's site, you can win a portion of the ¥10,000,000 prize. It's kind of like a Bilbo Baggins riddle. Good luck to everyone.

A Healthy 2014

This is taken from a calender with tips for staying healthy in 2014. The mom is yelling at the drunk father because the air conditioner is too cold. Apparently you can get sick if you drink a cold beverage in front of an air conditioner (it has nothing to do with the 12 beers). Anyway, my New Year's resolution is to drink beers in the warmest corner of any given room.

Sabado

Human A: Whoa, that's a crazy tattoo.
Human B: Well, I consider it more of an eccentric super tattoo, but...
Human A: Yeah, I guess cards with money signs and hearts is pretty eccentric.

Hardcore Zelda Hip Hop

Link is back... in "gangsta" form. Though this song seems to be on the cutting edge of sound technology, Girlbot says that it's a very old song with a few lyrics changed for the new game. Why aren't any Zelda rap songs released in America. I recommend sending threatening mail to Nintendo asking just this question. Happy New Year everyone!