Wednesday, August 12, 2015
Itasupo Rubbing Pillow
Huge news in the "pretending your pillow is your girlfriend" world! Our girlfriends can now talk when caressed!!!!! There are sensors in different spots in the pillow and will respond to your romantic touches. For example, the pillow Yuka Makuraba says, "That tickles," when her tummy is rubbed and, "I like when you do that," when you rub her forehead. See! It teaches you! I'll have to try that forehead rub thing if I'm ever near a woman. That's not all. If your touch is too strong, she says, "Can't you be more gentle?" Apparently, just like everyone's dream woman, she also tells you not to touch her in certain places!
By the way, she says she's 16 and the older sister of Rina. Rina was the original pillow. At the end they ask, "Which will be your wife!" So, um, yeah. I guess I'll date the younger one for 4 years before the big wedding night.
Did you want to see the sales representative and Rina pillow?
Monday, August 10, 2015
Super Viral GIF
It seems like the memes we made didn't go quite as viral as we'd hoped. Still, thank you for your support in making them go sort of viral. I've been informed that people like "GIFs", so let's make this go VIRAL!!! I was thinking Michelle Obama or Sesame Street could use it to show that eating vegetables is indeed cool.
Rest assured, this is only the tip of the iceberg of how much time I have and will waste!
Rest assured, this is only the tip of the iceberg of how much time I have and will waste!
Sunday, August 9, 2015
Regional Fuchiko
I truly believe I'm over my addiction to Fuchiko toys. The ones below were given to me as a souvenir. They were purchased on the toll road between Osaka and Nagoya, so they make the perfect gift if you forgot to buy a gift in the city you visited.
This time Fuchiko has teamed up with Hello Kitty. I guess they figure that some people like small women on their cups, and other people like Hello Kitty, so they should be able to sell twice as much or something. There are six identical positions for each toy, but the colors are different. The box on the left represents Nagoya, while the one on the right is for Osaka. For the Osaka one, her outfit looks like a Hanshin Tigers' uniform (the most popular baseball team in Osaka). The box is decorated with a famous food from Osaka (takoyaki), Osaka Castle, and Tsutenkaku Tower. The Nagoya one is yellow and orange because that's kind of the color of the golden fish on top of Nagoya Castle... and there are flowers. They couldn't think of anything for Nagoya, I guess.
Look at the ones I got!
Osaka is coming in strong with the hanging upside-down position. Let's check out Nagoya's representative.
Okay, she's just hanging there... Wait a second...
Money shot! Nagoya wins in a landslide!
This time Fuchiko has teamed up with Hello Kitty. I guess they figure that some people like small women on their cups, and other people like Hello Kitty, so they should be able to sell twice as much or something. There are six identical positions for each toy, but the colors are different. The box on the left represents Nagoya, while the one on the right is for Osaka. For the Osaka one, her outfit looks like a Hanshin Tigers' uniform (the most popular baseball team in Osaka). The box is decorated with a famous food from Osaka (takoyaki), Osaka Castle, and Tsutenkaku Tower. The Nagoya one is yellow and orange because that's kind of the color of the golden fish on top of Nagoya Castle... and there are flowers. They couldn't think of anything for Nagoya, I guess.
Look at the ones I got!
Osaka is coming in strong with the hanging upside-down position. Let's check out Nagoya's representative.
Okay, she's just hanging there... Wait a second...
Money shot! Nagoya wins in a landslide!
Saturday, August 8, 2015
Shoko Nakagawa's Cicada Hair
A lot of readers complained that I didn't show enough hot babes from the World Cosplay Summit yesterday. I think you guyz are all sexist, but if it's hot babes you want, it's hot babes you'll get. Here's a recent "tweet" from Shoko Nakagawa:
The caption reads:
Again this year, summer has finally come.
She's covered in the outer shells of a bunch of cicadas. Nature is so beautiful.
Ms. Nakagawa, who often goes by Shokotan, is a tarento and a bunch of other stuff. Basically, she's on TV all the time, but at first I didn't recognize her. I asked Girlbot who she was. She said she's a strange famous person.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"She really likes to smell cats' butts... Really likes it."
That's probably the most important fact I've heard about anyone ever.
今年も夏がやって来ました pic.twitter.com/AnabQknxmA
— 中川翔子@8/9ロッキン (@shoko55mmts) August 7, 2015
The caption reads:
Again this year, summer has finally come.
She's covered in the outer shells of a bunch of cicadas. Nature is so beautiful.
Ms. Nakagawa, who often goes by Shokotan, is a tarento and a bunch of other stuff. Basically, she's on TV all the time, but at first I didn't recognize her. I asked Girlbot who she was. She said she's a strange famous person.
"What do you mean?" I asked.
"She really likes to smell cats' butts... Really likes it."
That's probably the most important fact I've heard about anyone ever.
World Cosplay Summit 2015
A lot of people have been writing in telling me how much I suck in general and for not covering the World Cosplay Summit for a second year in a row. Luckily, a ton of other folks have put pictures on "twitter" and other sites.
You can obviously check out these other news sources, but I have found that you basically have to look at hundreds of cute/sexy girl pics before you find an actual cool costume. So if you want to see attractive women wearing next to nothing and trying to embody most men's fantasy, look elsewhere! It's time for the Times to give out some REAL awards!
"Cutest couple" award:
It's cool to see two people that clearly love each other so much despite their wildly different hair colors. #EternalLove
"Most erotic couple" award:
If you're not turned on right now, you're probably going to want to ask a doctor what's wrong with you.
"Best Crocodile Dundee" award:
Dundee is still at it with his old, "You call that a knife!" routine. Keep it up, "mate"!
"Best Kirby" award:
This is always one of the most competitive categories. Congratulations!
"Hottest stud" award:
Best smile award:
Just as the "tweet" noted, that's a very nice smile. Can't beat it this year!
"Best eyes" award:
Um, yes please! Daddy likey!
"Best eyes and eyebrows combination" award:
Wow! Also a close second for the "best smile" award.
"Best trio hand positioning" award:
These three just ran away with it this year.
"Best Abe Lincoln" award:
Surprisingly few competitors in this category, but he would have been tough to beat any year!
"Chap with whom you would most want to have a lager" award:
Would have been tough to beat even without the roller skate feet.
There you have it! I don't know, maybe we'll do some more coverage. Stay tuned?
本日はコスプレパレードの模様を伝えます： 世界コスプレサミット2015本戦リポート http://t.co/1HbUI5O0xN pic.twitter.com/uydFpzn3If
— ねとらぼ (@itm_nlab) August 2, 2015
You can obviously check out these other news sources, but I have found that you basically have to look at hundreds of cute/sexy girl pics before you find an actual cool costume. So if you want to see attractive women wearing next to nothing and trying to embody most men's fantasy, look elsewhere! It's time for the Times to give out some REAL awards!
"Cutest couple" award:
コスサミ後の仕事乗り切った！！ 今週終わり！ コミケ、盆休み前に450mの橋を概略設計したら乗り越えれる！(>_<) これでも、まだコスは5回ほどの夏からデビューしたばっかりの者で、橋の設計士してます← pic.twitter.com/XwJrxZSMLc
— たかやん@ｺｽｻﾐ キリト君 優ちゃん (@10niku3a) August 7, 2015
It's cool to see two people that clearly love each other so much despite their wildly different hair colors. #EternalLove
"Most erotic couple" award:
コスサミ1日目は 菊さんとイチャコラしてた♡ pic.twitter.com/O2cXmajYwv
— 萌琉(める)@コスサミお疲れ様でした (@tiaruhime_meru) August 7, 2015
If you're not turned on right now, you're probably going to want to ask a doctor what's wrong with you.
"Best Crocodile Dundee" award:
りりーあさん（@riria1114） からコスサミのお写真頂きました♪ありがとー！ 後ろで美味しそうなもの食べてるな…… pic.twitter.com/eMwt4NrLAE
— 八神宗知 / Souchi Yagami (@yagamisouchi) August 7, 2015
Dundee is still at it with his old, "You call that a knife!" routine. Keep it up, "mate"!
"Best Kirby" award:
夜のカービィ ~職質デラックス~ #コスサミ pic.twitter.com/ABZMKEZL83
— おもしろつぶやき集 (@vukahumakevu) August 7, 2015
This is always one of the most competitive categories. Congratulations!
"Hottest stud" award:
＼(^o^)／なう pic.twitter.com/LOL0P680Cj
— 小沢鋼樹@夏コミわdjed'3 (@siten1341) August 1, 2015
Anytime you put both boots and nipples in the same photo, you've got my attention! Yum yum!Best smile award:
Nicesmile！ #コスサミ pic.twitter.com/1wqVDWwekG
— つやったー (@tsuyatter) August 2, 2015
Just as the "tweet" noted, that's a very nice smile. Can't beat it this year!
"Best eyes" award:
— ハム速 (@hamusoku) August 2, 2015
Um, yes please! Daddy likey!
"Best eyes and eyebrows combination" award:
コスサミのオフィシャルキャクターの小手出来ましたー！ in コスサミ造形教室！ @cosplay_summit pic.twitter.com/v2ml75XbIO
— 麗華-REIKA-8/16東I-28b (@reika2011) July 31, 2015
Wow! Also a close second for the "best smile" award.
"Best trio hand positioning" award:
２日目、大須にて！ウォーボーイ！！ウォーボーイがいらっしゃったよーー！！(*´Д`*)もう本当格好良くて発見した瞬間から大興奮でした…！！Ｖ８を讃えよ！！！！ #WCS2015 #コスサミ pic.twitter.com/WD0Nf4aWdn
— ピザ子＠ﾃﾞｻﾞﾌｪｽ出る太郎 (@pzk_luna) August 4, 2015
These three just ran away with it this year.
"Best Abe Lincoln" award:
コスサミ終わって楽しみがなくなってからの仕事の苦痛（笑） 本当に楽しかったなぁ pic.twitter.com/ba3epaHKEl
— オザワ #コスサミ ジーノ&サヴァン (@savantOZAWA) August 4, 2015
Surprisingly few competitors in this category, but he would have been tough to beat any year!
"Chap with whom you would most want to have a lager" award:
さて、コスサミの画像頂いた物もあれば自分で撮った物も編集終わったので上げていきたいと思います。まずはとんでも戦士ムテキング＝ギャバソさん めっさカッコいいしポージングも動きもキレッキレでした！#wcs2015 #コスサミ pic.twitter.com/tx1e4xzDo2
— 鋼人@コスサミはオートボット司令官 (@koujint) August 6, 2015
Would have been tough to beat even without the roller skate feet.
There you have it! I don't know, maybe we'll do some more coverage. Stay tuned?
Thursday, August 6, 2015
Lemongina
For me, it tasted like a lemon version of Orangina. It was sweeter than I would want a lemonade to be. It also tasted a little grapefruity? It reminded me of Squirt a bit. Still, I didn't detect any soil seasoning. Girlbot tried it and said the aftertaste did not taste like dirt, but somehow smelled like dirt. She said after she swallowed, bubbles went up to her nose and wreaked of the earth. I don't know, maybe American dirt tastes different from Japanese dirt. I'll have to give it a try soon.
Suntory has recently tried to promote a new way to consume Lemongina. Why not mix it with another of their delicious products, Jim Beam? Here is a commercial where Rola demonstrates the making of this new creation.
I don't even need to try this to know what I'd think. Jim Beam makes everything at least pretty good, but I'll stick with the tried and true Beam & whole milk, thank you very much.
Tuesday, August 4, 2015
Chupa Chups
It's getting more and more difficult for corporations to successfully push sugar on a public that is increasingly aware of the dangers of diabetes and other health problems. Still, Chupa Chups does make a rather convincing argument for at least giving them a try:
Monday, August 3, 2015
Poo's Questionable Views
I know these days it's fashionable for young people to say they like poo and what have you, but did you know poo is pretty much openly anti-dolphin, or something? I mean, it's cool if you're pro-poo, just know what you're supporting. Get educated people!
Sunday, August 2, 2015
Banana Potato Chips
Japanese Food Review #103
These are made by Koikeya. They are a major company, but anyone in the Japanese snack game knows they are a poor man's Calbee's. They have produced three fruit flavored potato chips this year, peach, mandarin, and, the type we will be examining today, banana.
There is a "press release" on the Koikeya website explaining that they would like their fruit chips to become the "4th breakfast" joining bread, rice, and granola. They said they noticed that pancakes (perhaps considered a bread?) and granola are very popular with people in their 20s, 30s, and 40s. We all know that children and people over 50 hate pancakes. Anyway, they discovered that both pancakes and granola are often eaten with fruit! So why not spray chips with banana powder?!
While the bag says "banana powder was used", I couldn't detect any real banana flavor. I guess I'm not sure what banana powder means, but it was just that very fake banana taste. If you want to taste this and don't live in Japan, maybe grate some banana laffy taffy over some chips and enjoy. It was that exact flavor. That sounds awful, and it was, but it wasn't so bad that I couldn't eat it. I had two chips. I could have eaten the whole bag, but the thought, "What the hell am I doing?" came to mind, and I stopped.
I think the recipe they share on the back is also of interest.
It's marshmallow banana toast. You put marshmallows, bananas, and banana potato chips on toast and cover it in chocolate sauce. I think it's for people that are worried eating only chips for breakfast is unhealthy. They say the crunchy chips and fluffy marshmallows go well together.
Ratings:
Gaybot: 2.5 Again, I could eat it.
Girlbot: 1 She noted that the banana flavor is very strong when you first put it in your mouth, but it fades away and then only tastes like a chip.
Overall: 1.75
These are made by Koikeya. They are a major company, but anyone in the Japanese snack game knows they are a poor man's Calbee's. They have produced three fruit flavored potato chips this year, peach, mandarin, and, the type we will be examining today, banana.
There is a "press release" on the Koikeya website explaining that they would like their fruit chips to become the "4th breakfast" joining bread, rice, and granola. They said they noticed that pancakes (perhaps considered a bread?) and granola are very popular with people in their 20s, 30s, and 40s. We all know that children and people over 50 hate pancakes. Anyway, they discovered that both pancakes and granola are often eaten with fruit! So why not spray chips with banana powder?!
While the bag says "banana powder was used", I couldn't detect any real banana flavor. I guess I'm not sure what banana powder means, but it was just that very fake banana taste. If you want to taste this and don't live in Japan, maybe grate some banana laffy taffy over some chips and enjoy. It was that exact flavor. That sounds awful, and it was, but it wasn't so bad that I couldn't eat it. I had two chips. I could have eaten the whole bag, but the thought, "What the hell am I doing?" came to mind, and I stopped.
I think the recipe they share on the back is also of interest.
It's marshmallow banana toast. You put marshmallows, bananas, and banana potato chips on toast and cover it in chocolate sauce. I think it's for people that are worried eating only chips for breakfast is unhealthy. They say the crunchy chips and fluffy marshmallows go well together.
Ratings:
Gaybot: 2.5 Again, I could eat it.
Girlbot: 1 She noted that the banana flavor is very strong when you first put it in your mouth, but it fades away and then only tastes like a chip.
Overall: 1.75
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